Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Got out of that one

I mentioned that I might be considering doing a little super sprint tri coming up. Since then I have managed to talk myself out if it and talk a neighbor into it! Izaac and I have managed to have a fight or two over this tri and had to come to terms with not discussing it anymore. I had almost talked myself back into doing it (peer pressure) and decided to check the website to make sure it wasn't sold out (wishful thinking).

What I saw was even better (for me) - it was cancelled. Now that sucks for anyone really looking forward to the event or already had travel arrangements. For me, it's a weight off my shoulders. I temporarily thought about telling everyone I signed up and how disappointed I was that it wasn't happening!! Just kidding! That would be very naughty...besides Izaac would rat me out ;-)

I've also tried to figure out why I refused to go practice swimming but back out of the race because I was afraid to swim in a lake (again). Sigh. How many years till swimming just isn't an issue anymore?! In my defense though, I have really great excuses for not being able to get to the pool: a baby at home, a husband that I want to spend time with, work, 2 online classes, running (training for a half marathon), life, laundry, a glass of wine, "insert your favorite excuse here"! But I believe it boiled down to "I just didn't want to" :-).

One of these days, I will be able to view swimming like I do running and biking. That I will know without a doubt that I could enter a sprint tri tomorrow and get through it. I have this confidence with the other two sports but not swimming. BUT I WILL, someday.


Calyx Meredith said...

I think being honest and saying "I just don't want to" is tremendously powerful! Sorry you all had to fight about a tri, but good for you for working through all the pieces of it. And - not that I think your list isn't long enough for reasons not to get in the pool/lake - but...I will share that when each of my kids were born some fears/anxieties that I had eliminated or at least pushed past surfaced/resurfaced. The first time I didn't notice it, but by the third kid I definitely saw the pattern! My completely non-scientific opinion is that the part of "maternal instinct" that heightens our awareness and keeps our baby safe is not necessarily super helpful at helping us get past our own fear triggers. Give yourself a little time and a lot of love until your worldview settles down a bit. Peace!

Bootchez said...

Just stumbled across your blog (thru a link from your husband's . . . WHERE HAS HE BEEN??) and have enjoyed your last couple of posts and am interested in seeing how you deal with your challenges . . . I can *totally* empathize with your swimming issues and ready excuses, having plenty of my own. Also, good for you for the nursing school choice . . . I uprooted my life some 15 years ago to make the same choice and NEVER REGRETTED IT NOT ONCE . . . good luck, at first the whole thing is a little tricky but well worth the effort in the end.

under my own steam said...

I totally get the confidence about the swim. I have a hard time getting myself to the pool to do the workouts and it's the main thing that causes me to seriously question doing the half-iron in 22 days. Eek. I agree with you that you will someday have the confidence. I think it will come in time for me, the same way confidence has come about getting out and doing run races. Sending confidence mojo your way, chica.